This is really the biggest thing at the root of my disinterest in social media now, because it's not as if I can just reappear with a fresh start as if I'm a different person altogether to get out of this, and the stuff I dealt with I don't feel safe posting in a public capacity, so I can't just point at that and call it done.
it's really hard to feel like it's possible to reconnect with former friends I've fallen out of touch with when so much shit has changed and I carry so many new scars.
I don't want to push negative vibes into anyone's lap, basically. This is one of those ways that trauma can be isolating, I think.
I wish restaurants weren't so loud, it's so hard to exist in bc one of Those Things that autism does to my sensory processing is that I don't have selective hearing like other people do, so it's just an overwhelming cacophony.
I feel like I should invest in earplugs just so I don't gotta leave my friends behind while I step outside to get breaks.
"i use linux as my operating system," i state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. he swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision.
"actually," he says with a grin, "linux is just the kernel. you use GNU+linux."
i don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "i use alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU coreutils, or any other GNU code. it's linux, but it's not GNU+linux."
the smile quickly drops from the man's face. his body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth as he drop to the floor with a sickly thud. as he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!"
coolly, i reply "if windows was compiled with gcc, would that make it GNU?" i interrupt his response with "and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. even if you were correct, you won't be for long."
with a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. he lies on the floor, cold and limp. i've womansplained him to death.
(thread) ah yes, the dreaded inappropriate behavior
i feel like between "you're all assholes" (and its partial variants, like "the reason you're doing <thing> is because you're a bad person, stop making excuses") on the one hand, and *sometimes*, "it was an accident. *shrugs*" on the other, "autistic people learn from social situations. explain things patiently in regards to outcomes and why <thing> wasn't ok, and we'll understand" is getting lost at times.
so here's a thread about that.
Hey folks! My wonderful and amazing housemate @JacketButtonsArt has been out of work due to medical issues for several months and needs help getting money to pay for bills. She is doing commissions to bring in some money. Go commission her! https://beach.city/@JacketButtonsArt/101956614968751898
mid 20s polyamorous grey-ace gender enigma too tired for social media a lot of the time.
neurodiv + sleep disorder + other junk
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