So I just sent this text to our upstairs neighbor who is also the landlord's son. The censored name in the text is a former roommate.

Aerial shot. These are all our dishes that went missing when this former roommate had been living with us. We assumed she had taken them.

Transcription of the text message:
"Hey FYI, in case you've been wondering, the paper maché vulva sculpture in the basement full of dirty dishes, was something *** made which we only found today while investigating a strange smell we've noticed around the house. It's not ours and we are currently figuring out what to do with it. Anyway, if you've noticed an odd smell like a naired skunk lmk cuz we're trying to figure out the source."

COULD ANY OF THE WITCHES OF MASTODON HELP CONFIRM IF MY OLD ROOMMATE WAS ACTUALLY USING OUR DISHES IN THIS VULVA SHRINE TO HARNESS OUR ENERGIES FOR RITUALS?!?!?!

HOLY FUCK APPARENTLY THIS IS TRUE?!?!?!

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

WHAT

IS THIS WHY IT TOOK OVER A YEAR FOR ANYONE TO NOTICE IT?!?! MAGICK?!?!? WHAT DO WE DO?!!?

UPDATE: So we went downstairs and as unceremoniously as possible stomped it to pieces and threw it in the garbage while wearing latex gloves. We didn't take any more pictures of document the process because we didn't want to give it any more power

In the pot we found a gross red liquid which may or may not have been blood. While carrying it out of the basement to pour it out in the gutter I tripped and spilled it on tom's car and on myself. I'm gonna take a shower reciting a thousand brachas lmfao

When we tossed it in the garbage I said Shecheheyanu because it's my first time destroying a pagan ritual, then i said the bracha for destroying idols.

Sam sprayed the liquid away with a hose and our upstairs neighbor, the landlord's son, came down and talked about it all with us and made fun of it with us and reacted to the photos and we made light of it and he asked for the pictures to show his girlfriend

I have said al n'tilat yadayim while washing my hands every time lmao whether or not this thing had real power it's creepy af that we were living with someone collecting our shit to harness our energies or whatever

We threw the pot in the garbage and the other dishes are in a paper bag outside and we're not sure what to do with them yet. Throw them out or bleach them. Some sentimental things are in there

@shel this thread has officially made me paganphobic. or just. generally phobic of weird, gross shrines.

Follow

@starwall YEAH AFTER THIS I'M LIKE

MAYBE THE PAGANS NEED TO BE SMITED AFTERALL LMAO

@shel religious freedom is great n' all but if it means leaving a paper shrine filled with bodily fluid and dirty dishes in someone else's house then I feel as if you've crossed some kind of line

@shel there ARE words that could be had about the importance of sanitation and cleanliness even in places you live in

@shel this thread has been profoundly shocking and I can only imagine how you're feeling rn having just lived it???

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